It seems like only yesterday I had just wrote my first posting for the year of the Dog, and now, one year later, I'm writing (finally) for the the year of the Pork.
Ba-kwa, BK or Bereaved Knowledge, is when your knowledge of what you know or used to (think you) know got burnt at the altar. Thus leaving you with the same ashen state you started with. As with the adage, from dust to dust shall ye return, in no time shall your knowledge and wisdom be put on trial. Relieving you of all things wise, upon your renouncement.
It's 5 minutes to midnight, so excuse a tired soul for the words he speaks. Especially so the thoughts he triggered. But should you find yourself head on with what he collided into, you would have thought, wrote and spoke the same.
Six months ago, I wrote off this journal altogether.
Six months later, I wrote after giving it much thought.
But for now, all will wait.
While sleep overpowers me.
In my bower, I retire.
Ba-kwa, BK or Bereaved Knowledge, is when your knowledge of what you know or used to (think you) know got burnt at the altar. Thus leaving you with the same ashen state you started with. As with the adage, from dust to dust shall ye return, in no time shall your knowledge and wisdom be put on trial. Relieving you of all things wise, upon your renouncement.
It's 5 minutes to midnight, so excuse a tired soul for the words he speaks. Especially so the thoughts he triggered. But should you find yourself head on with what he collided into, you would have thought, wrote and spoke the same.
Six months ago, I wrote off this journal altogether.
Six months later, I wrote after giving it much thought.
But for now, all will wait.
While sleep overpowers me.
In my bower, I retire.
- Mood:
sleepy
It's been a while since I last wrote. Maybe I'm not as keen as I first started out in the blogosphere. Or I'm just too lazy to transfer my thoughts into words, typed out. Either way, I'm just feeling the blues.
The month started out with me visiting my new found convenient joints. Not that ShowGunny or BluesHaven are new in the scene, but having dramatically destroyed my previous 7-eleven's privilege cards.. I had to find new places of interest.
The words to a love story written by my sworn brother kept playing in my mind.
"If I can't lose myself in love, I will lose myself in lust."
I know that the idea is sick, even if I had to hear myself say so. But what else is there to do? I've been single for a good one year plus, and the pangs of loneliness is slowly showing his fangs.
I am missing all there is to miss about sleeping beside that special someone. For that one night, I thought I had found it in one person. But fate has something else in mind, and when I found out the truth about his status quo, I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. That was the last I heard from him. Or rather, the last time he saw me.
But he isn't the first. Neither was he the last. And that is where life's sucky irony begins.
To quote the lyrics of Alicia Key's Karma, "..what goes around, comes around.. what goes up, must come down.."
I've met a few more Good Ones after him. But they almost always turned out to be already attached for a good donkey years (read: more than 5 years), with no indication of a near possible divorce. However, last night's assault has got to be the ultimo.
"I've got something to tell you. I've been seeing this girl..somewhat.. and we might get married next year."
Oof! His words smacked me right there in the face. And to think I actually thought we were meeting up to catch up on the old times. But to actually hear those words.. jeeez! I don't know what to make of it. But we ended up sleeping on the same bed beside each other and caught up with what we had missed out for more than a year. It was a very good night. But the news still lingers long after the release was over.
"Are you really getting married? To a girl?"
Am I becoming desperate?
So desperate has the want to get attached again, and feel what it's like to be in a loving relationship, that I had totally misplaced my lust with love? Or was it love with lust?
It's been so long since I had someone to talk to well into the late night, that when the chance came, I jumped at it almost head first, only to be nearly hit head on with the collision. I'm not interested in becoming a (the) third party. But the fact staring looking at me straight in the face, once too many times, is making me lose sight of what it really means to find that special someone.
What if life's irony continued, and I lose sight altogether, grown so immune to the "yeah, I'm already attached/got a bf" that I totally pushed love away altogether? That to have fun in the company of "married" men would at least sound so much better than to be alone?
Wouldn't that make me a whore?
The month started out with me visiting my new found convenient joints. Not that ShowGunny or BluesHaven are new in the scene, but having dramatically destroyed my previous 7-eleven's privilege cards.. I had to find new places of interest.
The words to a love story written by my sworn brother kept playing in my mind.
"If I can't lose myself in love, I will lose myself in lust."
I know that the idea is sick, even if I had to hear myself say so. But what else is there to do? I've been single for a good one year plus, and the pangs of loneliness is slowly showing his fangs.
I am missing all there is to miss about sleeping beside that special someone. For that one night, I thought I had found it in one person. But fate has something else in mind, and when I found out the truth about his status quo, I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. That was the last I heard from him. Or rather, the last time he saw me.
But he isn't the first. Neither was he the last. And that is where life's sucky irony begins.
To quote the lyrics of Alicia Key's Karma, "..what goes around, comes around.. what goes up, must come down.."
I've met a few more Good Ones after him. But they almost always turned out to be already attached for a good donkey years (read: more than 5 years), with no indication of a near possible divorce. However, last night's assault has got to be the ultimo.
"I've got something to tell you. I've been seeing this girl..somewhat.. and we might get married next year."
Oof! His words smacked me right there in the face. And to think I actually thought we were meeting up to catch up on the old times. But to actually hear those words.. jeeez! I don't know what to make of it. But we ended up sleeping on the same bed beside each other and caught up with what we had missed out for more than a year. It was a very good night. But the news still lingers long after the release was over.
"Are you really getting married? To a girl?"
Am I becoming desperate?
So desperate has the want to get attached again, and feel what it's like to be in a loving relationship, that I had totally misplaced my lust with love? Or was it love with lust?
It's been so long since I had someone to talk to well into the late night, that when the chance came, I jumped at it almost head first, only to be nearly hit head on with the collision. I'm not interested in becoming a (the) third party. But the fact staring looking at me straight in the face, once too many times, is making me lose sight of what it really means to find that special someone.
What if life's irony continued, and I lose sight altogether, grown so immune to the "yeah, I'm already attached/got a bf" that I totally pushed love away altogether? That to have fun in the company of "married" men would at least sound so much better than to be alone?
Wouldn't that make me a whore?
- Mood:
lonely - Music:frente's bizarre love triangle
Today I attended a workplan seminar for my organisation in Singapore Expo. Not knowing what to expect as it was my first such event, I dressed up in my brightly-colored striped A&F polo tee which I had recently purchased from my trip. After all, with all the top management and important senior officers present, it is always better to be seen than to stay hidden amongst the sea of faces.
But little did I know I would get more than what I bargained for.
An hour before lunchtime, the 100 attendees or so were broken up into smaller groups of ten. And in each group, we were told to discuss and talk about the video which had been shown to us earlier. The video was an enjoyable multi-media presentation consisting of the various working groups contributing their feedback and comments regarding the shift to a newer and better purpose-built complex.
As I didn't volunteer to be the note-taker in my small group, the person who did - and he happened to be one of my many indirect superiors - decided that I should be the one to present our ideas to the larger conference group. Mind you, having joined some of the older staffs for breakfast much much earlier before registration for the seminar begins, I wasn't really sure if I know what was expected of me. But what I do know is that I would never dreamt of saying No.
I have always loved presenting and speaking in front of an audience. Better yet if it was done on the stage, where I'll be the tallest person at that point of time in the room. Hell, I'm even comfortable dancing on stage or podiums in front of all present to see. Stage whore? Call it whatever you want, because bottomline is - I engage those who are observing me. It gives me a sense of satisfaction to see their faces, looking back at me.
And that was exactly how my first night in Bangkok started.
My friends were put off by the ugly sight that greeted us by the time we got ourselves to Silom. There, in the alley leading up to DJ Station, was - not a crowd by any other name but - a stampede of gay men togged in the stylish whathaveyous, or in this case, the lackof clothing. And yes, if you were there, pushing, shoving, being pushed, being shoved and being carried from the entrance all the way inside for what seemed like an eternity to the landing steps that would get you to the 2nd floor... you would just call it a night. And that was exactly what my friends did. They left. Leaving me alone on the 2nd floor, near the steps, with nobody to really dance with nor ka-chinked my glass of drink to. It was luck that I bumped into an ex of mine. But I spoke too soon, for he was of no help either. As I later found out, this butterfly of an ex was far too busy socialising with the many many gay friends to really be much of a good company. Thank god for his 'farang' (white) friend. But that didn't helped much either, as he was more quiet than chatty. Just when I thought the night was going to be over at 2am (club closed at this early hour), 'farang' actually spoke and asked if I was heading for the afterhours party. I replied, almost pounced back with my answer, why not. After all, I could use with some more drinks and more good music. And that was the truth. There was nothing quite like the music playing in DJ. It could have been a radio spinning or some mp3 playing for all I care, but hey, at least in there, they play good music! Something sg gay clubs here should really sit up and pay attention.
Anyway, like I said, my night in bkk didn't really start until after 2am. Again, I love being up on the stage, in front of everyone present, dancing or speaking. And for that first night in bkk, it was dancing to the good beats siphoning out from the loud bass-filled speakers nearby. I wasn't on the stage tho. It just got better. I was on the 2nd floor. Nearer to the stairs foyer, looking down to all present below. I assure you, if I'm down there, I can like see that guy up there, mooooving to the rhythm of the night, upper torso independent of the lower half. It was like watching a moth doing a seductive dance around the flame. Sensuous. Deliberate. Slow. Sexy. I was all that and more, as I feel the liquid touched the soul, coursing through the veins which flowed inside me. That was how strong and cheap the drinks were. It was enough to make a statement sans the puking.
And then he smiled. At first slowly. Then surely.
But that is what I like about bkk. The people. They are friendly. Always ready with a smile. And more often than not, their smiles are not laced with hidden intentions or ulterior motives. Even when they are, which I later found out, many of them are shy and would blush at the thought of even stepping forward to say forth their thoughts. Is this the same reason why many white men fall in love with the locals? Or with time, has that changed and the bucks be the driving force as per se everything else around the world?
From that night on, I never looked back. I got lucky, and here I do mean lucky in a big way. Not once. Not even twice. But mind you, four times in all the four nights that I was there! To top it all off for this virgin trip, I received not just one, but three email addresses from 3 different guys. 1 local, 1 taiwanese and 1 boy of 24 from shanghai. And to put this down in ink for all that is worth, I even had one guy in the plane playing eyes with me, with my friend sitting to my left as witness!! Lol!
It was such an amazing trip that I was almost reminded of my first trip to HK. Mr Lazy was right. The first is always the best. His many firsts is proof of that. And now I have my own first trips to talk about.
As for bkk... I never thought I would actually say this but, I miss bkk. So very the god damn much!
I hadn't really meant for this trip to be a sex trip. Neither did I planned for things to be this good. I just decided to tag along because it was my first trip, and even then I didn't really think I would enjoy nor like my trip to bkk. After all, I had the mindset that KL was much better. But ask me the same question now, and I would have to say that bkk is better. And yes, I cannot wait to go back soon.
Already, like wonderwoman herself, I've been downloading some Thai songs to fill my longing.
As for my presentation during the workplan seminar... I did more than just great. I had left the audience with an impression, of who I am. I had started my presentation of ideas with the words, "Before I begin, I would like to say good afternoon the Commander.. my SOP.. (much applause and whistles) and my DY SOP.. who happened to be in my group.. (more applause and louder whistles and cat calls and cheers!)"
I hadn't realised my opening alone was a statement in itself. I mean, who would have thought what you had always been taught in school, would work wonders for your career now. :)
So there. I returned back to my seat with people coming up to give me many pats on the back. That I had engaged them while I spoke could be clearly seen. But what was even better, was that I had made a difference to the otherwise dull and boring afternoon presentation.
To bkk.. I'll be back. Soon.
But little did I know I would get more than what I bargained for.
An hour before lunchtime, the 100 attendees or so were broken up into smaller groups of ten. And in each group, we were told to discuss and talk about the video which had been shown to us earlier. The video was an enjoyable multi-media presentation consisting of the various working groups contributing their feedback and comments regarding the shift to a newer and better purpose-built complex.
As I didn't volunteer to be the note-taker in my small group, the person who did - and he happened to be one of my many indirect superiors - decided that I should be the one to present our ideas to the larger conference group. Mind you, having joined some of the older staffs for breakfast much much earlier before registration for the seminar begins, I wasn't really sure if I know what was expected of me. But what I do know is that I would never dreamt of saying No.
I have always loved presenting and speaking in front of an audience. Better yet if it was done on the stage, where I'll be the tallest person at that point of time in the room. Hell, I'm even comfortable dancing on stage or podiums in front of all present to see. Stage whore? Call it whatever you want, because bottomline is - I engage those who are observing me. It gives me a sense of satisfaction to see their faces, looking back at me.
And that was exactly how my first night in Bangkok started.
My friends were put off by the ugly sight that greeted us by the time we got ourselves to Silom. There, in the alley leading up to DJ Station, was - not a crowd by any other name but - a stampede of gay men togged in the stylish whathaveyous, or in this case, the lackof clothing. And yes, if you were there, pushing, shoving, being pushed, being shoved and being carried from the entrance all the way inside for what seemed like an eternity to the landing steps that would get you to the 2nd floor... you would just call it a night. And that was exactly what my friends did. They left. Leaving me alone on the 2nd floor, near the steps, with nobody to really dance with nor ka-chinked my glass of drink to. It was luck that I bumped into an ex of mine. But I spoke too soon, for he was of no help either. As I later found out, this butterfly of an ex was far too busy socialising with the many many gay friends to really be much of a good company. Thank god for his 'farang' (white) friend. But that didn't helped much either, as he was more quiet than chatty. Just when I thought the night was going to be over at 2am (club closed at this early hour), 'farang' actually spoke and asked if I was heading for the afterhours party. I replied, almost pounced back with my answer, why not. After all, I could use with some more drinks and more good music. And that was the truth. There was nothing quite like the music playing in DJ. It could have been a radio spinning or some mp3 playing for all I care, but hey, at least in there, they play good music! Something sg gay clubs here should really sit up and pay attention.
Anyway, like I said, my night in bkk didn't really start until after 2am. Again, I love being up on the stage, in front of everyone present, dancing or speaking. And for that first night in bkk, it was dancing to the good beats siphoning out from the loud bass-filled speakers nearby. I wasn't on the stage tho. It just got better. I was on the 2nd floor. Nearer to the stairs foyer, looking down to all present below. I assure you, if I'm down there, I can like see that guy up there, mooooving to the rhythm of the night, upper torso independent of the lower half. It was like watching a moth doing a seductive dance around the flame. Sensuous. Deliberate. Slow. Sexy. I was all that and more, as I feel the liquid touched the soul, coursing through the veins which flowed inside me. That was how strong and cheap the drinks were. It was enough to make a statement sans the puking.
And then he smiled. At first slowly. Then surely.
But that is what I like about bkk. The people. They are friendly. Always ready with a smile. And more often than not, their smiles are not laced with hidden intentions or ulterior motives. Even when they are, which I later found out, many of them are shy and would blush at the thought of even stepping forward to say forth their thoughts. Is this the same reason why many white men fall in love with the locals? Or with time, has that changed and the bucks be the driving force as per se everything else around the world?
From that night on, I never looked back. I got lucky, and here I do mean lucky in a big way. Not once. Not even twice. But mind you, four times in all the four nights that I was there! To top it all off for this virgin trip, I received not just one, but three email addresses from 3 different guys. 1 local, 1 taiwanese and 1 boy of 24 from shanghai. And to put this down in ink for all that is worth, I even had one guy in the plane playing eyes with me, with my friend sitting to my left as witness!! Lol!
It was such an amazing trip that I was almost reminded of my first trip to HK. Mr Lazy was right. The first is always the best. His many firsts is proof of that. And now I have my own first trips to talk about.
As for bkk... I never thought I would actually say this but, I miss bkk. So very the god damn much!
I hadn't really meant for this trip to be a sex trip. Neither did I planned for things to be this good. I just decided to tag along because it was my first trip, and even then I didn't really think I would enjoy nor like my trip to bkk. After all, I had the mindset that KL was much better. But ask me the same question now, and I would have to say that bkk is better. And yes, I cannot wait to go back soon.
Already, like wonderwoman herself, I've been downloading some Thai songs to fill my longing.
As for my presentation during the workplan seminar... I did more than just great. I had left the audience with an impression, of who I am. I had started my presentation of ideas with the words, "Before I begin, I would like to say good afternoon the Commander.. my SOP.. (much applause and whistles) and my DY SOP.. who happened to be in my group.. (more applause and louder whistles and cat calls and cheers!)"
I hadn't realised my opening alone was a statement in itself. I mean, who would have thought what you had always been taught in school, would work wonders for your career now. :)
So there. I returned back to my seat with people coming up to give me many pats on the back. That I had engaged them while I spoke could be clearly seen. But what was even better, was that I had made a difference to the otherwise dull and boring afternoon presentation.
To bkk.. I'll be back. Soon.
- Mood:
awake
zuco's entry about paved with good intentions, had me clicking on the link and spending the next few minutes glued on the monitor as i read what colin and joyceln had to say. my reading habits couldn't have returned from its leave of absence at a better timing.
reading the article, i felt a stirring inside me, albeit a different kind. one which, like both colin and joyceln, i've shelved. a dream of doing something i love versus becoming the person society dictates me to be. the inner voice hidden in our child-like mind as opposed to the voice we have all grown accustomed to in our transition of becoming an adult. i thought of the little prince and his snake which had swallowed an elephant. when then did the hat appears?
colin spoke of his near death 'epiphany' that made him rethink his goals in life. one which does not sees him holed up in his office cubicle while his bank receives 'sizeable amount of income' from his hard work. joyceln painted 2 different stories for anyone to ponder over and then asked ourselves which of the two do we find ourselves in. does that explain why a number of my friends has expressed their preference in working and living overseas. even i have entertained thoughts about retiring overseas, anywhere but here on this "Island that Could".
while zuco's favourite line from the article was "We spend all our youth chasing money, and when we attain it, we spend all our money chasing youth." mine has got to be this:
"A Dream carries you on its wings to worlds that your heart and mind have never known."
such is the charming naivety a dreamer possess. one which i vividly recalls with fond memories the first time i met Joe. thoughts of us being together, and that love would be forever.
the same is applied to one's dream. in life.
my tee, who has been significant in my growing up years, lives his every day to the fullest. and i shall do the same.
and what better way than to start with my virgin trip to bkk. as you can see, i'm excited. more than excited, even if the rest of the groupies aren't. it is, afterall, my first time to bkk. to use one of joyceln's stories - "you wake up and you have no idea what is going to happen today, tomorrow, 6 months or a year later. Ironically, because of this uncertainty, all possibilities exist for you."
here's to life! for being single isn't really as bad as it seems. or looks. or feel.
reading the article, i felt a stirring inside me, albeit a different kind. one which, like both colin and joyceln, i've shelved. a dream of doing something i love versus becoming the person society dictates me to be. the inner voice hidden in our child-like mind as opposed to the voice we have all grown accustomed to in our transition of becoming an adult. i thought of the little prince and his snake which had swallowed an elephant. when then did the hat appears?
colin spoke of his near death 'epiphany' that made him rethink his goals in life. one which does not sees him holed up in his office cubicle while his bank receives 'sizeable amount of income' from his hard work. joyceln painted 2 different stories for anyone to ponder over and then asked ourselves which of the two do we find ourselves in. does that explain why a number of my friends has expressed their preference in working and living overseas. even i have entertained thoughts about retiring overseas, anywhere but here on this "Island that Could".
while zuco's favourite line from the article was "We spend all our youth chasing money, and when we attain it, we spend all our money chasing youth." mine has got to be this:
"A Dream carries you on its wings to worlds that your heart and mind have never known."
such is the charming naivety a dreamer possess. one which i vividly recalls with fond memories the first time i met Joe. thoughts of us being together, and that love would be forever.
the same is applied to one's dream. in life.
my tee, who has been significant in my growing up years, lives his every day to the fullest. and i shall do the same.
and what better way than to start with my virgin trip to bkk. as you can see, i'm excited. more than excited, even if the rest of the groupies aren't. it is, afterall, my first time to bkk. to use one of joyceln's stories - "you wake up and you have no idea what is going to happen today, tomorrow, 6 months or a year later. Ironically, because of this uncertainty, all possibilities exist for you."
here's to life! for being single isn't really as bad as it seems. or looks. or feel.
- Mood:
excited - Music:Lum May Yee's my one and only
HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION
Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"
Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! ... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember:
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"
oops.. the above title should have been 'Censorship by S. Balaji..
Taken from the NewsBite of sgboy's website: Senior Minister of State for Information, Communications and the Arts Balaji Sadasivan publicly named two gay websites that were censored by the Media Development Authority (MDA) in parliament yesterday.
Dr Balaji revealed this when pointing out that actions will be taken against offensive material on sites hosted in Singapore or written by Singaporeans. This was notwithstanding the ‘light-touch’ approach adopted by MDA.
Under the ‘light-touch’ approach, a euphemism for self-censorship, the authorities claim that they would take enforcement actions only upon receiving public complaints.
According to Balaji, MDA had intervened last year to get Fridae to remove links to 'materials depicting incest and members soliciting for sex.'
He also disclosed that MDA placed fluffboy on a blacklist which blocks access to the site from Singapore after it claims that 'the site’s members exchanged photos of naked, underage boys.'
It is unusual for the government to publicly name sites which they have banned as they think it would encourage more traffic to these sites.
SGBOY has had its fair share of run-ins with the authorities when it was asked to remove several postings from its forums and classifieds.
Ted Yeo, a media analyst SGBOY spoke to said, 'Gay websites are easy targets for the authorities because it’s easier to find contents that would be considered "objectionable" for public consumption. There is a need to recognise that gay websites serve the interests of a specific community that is already marginalised by mainstream media.'
SGBOY understands that fluffboy has ceased operations since last year while Fridae has recently taken down its forum section entirely.
A comment from sandrider sums up many of how gaymen are feeling:
it is amazing that sammyboy.com is still around and MDA have not fined it or taken it down. well, it is about straight sex, even though the girls might be 'underaged' and the postings lewd, so that is okay, "... based on justice and equality ...". Anyone read 'Animal Farm'?
Click here for more comments about the article.
Taken from the NewsBite of sgboy's website: Senior Minister of State for Information, Communications and the Arts Balaji Sadasivan publicly named two gay websites that were censored by the Media Development Authority (MDA) in parliament yesterday.
Dr Balaji revealed this when pointing out that actions will be taken against offensive material on sites hosted in Singapore or written by Singaporeans. This was notwithstanding the ‘light-touch’ approach adopted by MDA.
Under the ‘light-touch’ approach, a euphemism for self-censorship, the authorities claim that they would take enforcement actions only upon receiving public complaints.
According to Balaji, MDA had intervened last year to get Fridae to remove links to 'materials depicting incest and members soliciting for sex.'
He also disclosed that MDA placed fluffboy on a blacklist which blocks access to the site from Singapore after it claims that 'the site’s members exchanged photos of naked, underage boys.'
It is unusual for the government to publicly name sites which they have banned as they think it would encourage more traffic to these sites.
SGBOY has had its fair share of run-ins with the authorities when it was asked to remove several postings from its forums and classifieds.
Ted Yeo, a media analyst SGBOY spoke to said, 'Gay websites are easy targets for the authorities because it’s easier to find contents that would be considered "objectionable" for public consumption. There is a need to recognise that gay websites serve the interests of a specific community that is already marginalised by mainstream media.'
SGBOY understands that fluffboy has ceased operations since last year while Fridae has recently taken down its forum section entirely.
A comment from sandrider sums up many of how gaymen are feeling:
it is amazing that sammyboy.com is still around and MDA have not fined it or taken it down. well, it is about straight sex, even though the girls might be 'underaged' and the postings lewd, so that is okay, "... based on justice and equality ...". Anyone read 'Animal Farm'?
Click here for more comments about the article.
i'm at my wits end. it seems that once in a blue moon when i finally do meet someone i like, i ended up losing him. whatever two or three nights spent on getting to know him ended up - spent. they either disappear quietly into the night, the same way they came. or they just stopped calling. smsing.
i'm at my wits end. for knowing a person takes time. yet when time is allocated to know someone after risking to even try, i lost it. barely days after i just began. whatever happened to the dating game? has it all been shortened to accommodate something else? what am i missing then? i've tried putting off sex with a recent somebody i just met. i've always known sex to be the damper, the hara kiri to any dating game. yet, a weekend was all it takes. monday comes, and i've not heard from him since. is it just me then?
i'm at my wits end. an episode of sex and the city came to mind. carrie wrote that we all have two great loves in our life. and that after two, love just stops. we stopped having love. if that be true, have i used up my two chances? going back in time, my first was joe. it always has been joe. but it was love, short lived. a level headed person who always makes the wrong decision. i kicked myself many times in the head for losing him. and then.. there was tee. if little cupid could count, does that explains the reason why his arrows have all missed me? or has he given me a miss? wouldn't i have prefered a miss-ter?
i'm at my wits end. the meaning of dating has escaped me. the ones that i fancied or think that we could be an item, thought otherwise. it hurts more when silence is used to end the game. it leaves you hanging. they just copped out, even tho we connect. and then there are those who we still connect. but i don't fancy. that we're better as friends. they want me. still they persisted, long after i stopped. why? i feel so trapped. lost.
the sun sets. the moon shines her beam. while the trees sleep, the leaves begin to breathe.
a cycle sets in motion, of feelings trapped and desires unwont.
a cuckoo of the game have the players made, and i too spared none.
it isn't that love is impossible to find. it isn't that great loves are ruled by two.
but physical as superficial it sounds does plays a part.
and humans being kind, have only ourselves to kid.
for what'er beauty translates, at the end of the day it is them we see, our mate.
tired, from tripping life's case.
i'm at my wits end. for knowing a person takes time. yet when time is allocated to know someone after risking to even try, i lost it. barely days after i just began. whatever happened to the dating game? has it all been shortened to accommodate something else? what am i missing then? i've tried putting off sex with a recent somebody i just met. i've always known sex to be the damper, the hara kiri to any dating game. yet, a weekend was all it takes. monday comes, and i've not heard from him since. is it just me then?
i'm at my wits end. an episode of sex and the city came to mind. carrie wrote that we all have two great loves in our life. and that after two, love just stops. we stopped having love. if that be true, have i used up my two chances? going back in time, my first was joe. it always has been joe. but it was love, short lived. a level headed person who always makes the wrong decision. i kicked myself many times in the head for losing him. and then.. there was tee. if little cupid could count, does that explains the reason why his arrows have all missed me? or has he given me a miss? wouldn't i have prefered a miss-ter?
i'm at my wits end. the meaning of dating has escaped me. the ones that i fancied or think that we could be an item, thought otherwise. it hurts more when silence is used to end the game. it leaves you hanging. they just copped out, even tho we connect. and then there are those who we still connect. but i don't fancy. that we're better as friends. they want me. still they persisted, long after i stopped. why? i feel so trapped. lost.
the sun sets. the moon shines her beam. while the trees sleep, the leaves begin to breathe.
a cycle sets in motion, of feelings trapped and desires unwont.
a cuckoo of the game have the players made, and i too spared none.
it isn't that love is impossible to find. it isn't that great loves are ruled by two.
but physical as superficial it sounds does plays a part.
and humans being kind, have only ourselves to kid.
for what'er beauty translates, at the end of the day it is them we see, our mate.
tired, from tripping life's case.
I was still up watching both the summary of the Commonwealth Games and Paul Sng, the anchorman, when the men's 1m springboard had me sit up in good ol' attention style.
There, in black trunks, short jet black hair, fine features and a smooth fair lean muscle frame gained from all his time as a diver, stood the object of possibly every Asian. My close friends, who have always not been a great supporter of my Malaysians object of desire, would beg to differ. That much I'm sure. But to see an Asian, or rather Eurasian to be more precise , in the swimming event and one who matches up to his counterparts - in more ways than one - I have to admit, I had my eyes glued to the tv.
Yeoh Ken Nee.
Born 30th April 1983, Ken Nee has not only proved to be successful as a national diver in the water, but also among people on land as he has been described by those who know him as someone who is "sweet and very sociable". Just to prove my point, here are some of his swimming achievements and participation in the water.
:· Islamic Solidarity Games 2005 :Gold in the 3m springboard
:· FINA World Championships in Montreal Jul 2005 :14th in the 3m Synchronised Springboard (Rossharisham)
:· Asian Championship 2005 :Silver when he breached the 700-point barrier for the first time
:· Sydney Olympic Games 2000 :22nd in the 3m Springboard | :24th in the 10m Platform
:· Kuala Lumpur Commonwealth Games 1998 :8th in the 3m Springboard | :4th in the 10m Platform
And of course you have his recent sure win award in the Melbourne Commonwealth Games 2006, where he finished off 2nd in the Aquatics Diving Men's 1m Springboard, trailing 4.10 just behind Canada's Despatie Alexandre with a total score of 844.95. Look out for his next event today - 23/03/2006, 1000hrs - Aquatics Diving Men's 3m Springboard.
Just in case you're wondering how he ranked against other divers.
:· World Ranking :78th in the 3m Springboard (2005)
And if you think Yeoh Ken Nee is all what the media hyped him out to be, he is really your typical (as my close friends describe his type) Malaysian. Friendly. Sociable. Simple. This boy of mixed parentage with blue/brown eyes, took 2 years off from his passion - diving - in order to obtain his Psychology Degree from Help University College.
From his cousin's personal blog - http://www.yvonnefoong.com - Ken Nee himself had posted a comment containing his email and hp details, because a poster had actually asked if he could contact the boy for an adveritising deal. I'm going to put it here for my reference. :)
Yeoh Ken Nee
malaysia hp: +017 677 7890
mail: maximpiano@yahoo.com
There, in black trunks, short jet black hair, fine features and a smooth fair lean muscle frame gained from all his time as a diver, stood the object of possibly every Asian. My close friends, who have always not been a great supporter of my Malaysians object of desire, would beg to differ. That much I'm sure. But to see an Asian, or rather Eurasian to be more precise , in the swimming event and one who matches up to his counterparts - in more ways than one - I have to admit, I had my eyes glued to the tv.
Yeoh Ken Nee.
Born 30th April 1983, Ken Nee has not only proved to be successful as a national diver in the water, but also among people on land as he has been described by those who know him as someone who is "sweet and very sociable". Just to prove my point, here are some of his swimming achievements and participation in the water.
:· Islamic Solidarity Games 2005 :Gold in the 3m springboard
:· FINA World Championships in Montreal Jul 2005 :14th in the 3m Synchronised Springboard (Rossharisham)
:· Asian Championship 2005 :Silver when he breached the 700-point barrier for the first time
:· Sydney Olympic Games 2000 :22nd in the 3m Springboard | :24th in the 10m Platform
:· Kuala Lumpur Commonwealth Games 1998 :8th in the 3m Springboard | :4th in the 10m Platform
And of course you have his recent sure win award in the Melbourne Commonwealth Games 2006, where he finished off 2nd in the Aquatics Diving Men's 1m Springboard, trailing 4.10 just behind Canada's Despatie Alexandre with a total score of 844.95. Look out for his next event today - 23/03/2006, 1000hrs - Aquatics Diving Men's 3m Springboard.
Just in case you're wondering how he ranked against other divers.
:· World Ranking :78th in the 3m Springboard (2005)
And if you think Yeoh Ken Nee is all what the media hyped him out to be, he is really your typical (as my close friends describe his type) Malaysian. Friendly. Sociable. Simple. This boy of mixed parentage with blue/brown eyes, took 2 years off from his passion - diving - in order to obtain his Psychology Degree from Help University College.
From his cousin's personal blog - http://www.yvonnefoong.com - Ken Nee himself had posted a comment containing his email and hp details, because a poster had actually asked if he could contact the boy for an adveritising deal. I'm going to put it here for my reference. :)
Yeoh Ken Nee
malaysia hp: +017 677 7890
mail: maximpiano@yahoo.com
hmm.. I wet my boxer & brief twice recently, and in the short span of one month too.
The whole thing was strange really, considering that I've stopped having wet dreams since like umm.. years back? I just find it strange, even if others don't, because it just doesn't make sense for me to be having wet dreams during my sleep and afternoon nap. But that I did.
And to suddenly wake up from the dream with that distant-familiar feeling of stickyness, well.. my first reaction was that of amazement. It was the smell of sperm that eventually had me running to the bathroom.
Is this a sign that I haven't been having enough playtime?
Or have I been so engrossed with taking my career of the ground, that I've neglected the love department in my life?
Then again, what love department? I'm just enjoying my life being single, beefed up (and still pumping) and dad's cooking at home.
p/s I just have to add that the dreams were both different in nature. One happened after bumping into my 3-year-old ThaiExpress guy at the usual club. The dream seemed so real, I could almost feel his lips on mine! As for the other dream.. I can't really remember the exact details, but it happened before my surprise encounter. What it was about? I don't know. I was probably still reeling from the shock.
The whole thing was strange really, considering that I've stopped having wet dreams since like umm.. years back? I just find it strange, even if others don't, because it just doesn't make sense for me to be having wet dreams during my sleep and afternoon nap. But that I did.
And to suddenly wake up from the dream with that distant-familiar feeling of stickyness, well.. my first reaction was that of amazement. It was the smell of sperm that eventually had me running to the bathroom.
Is this a sign that I haven't been having enough playtime?
Or have I been so engrossed with taking my career of the ground, that I've neglected the love department in my life?
Then again, what love department? I'm just enjoying my life being single, beefed up (and still pumping) and dad's cooking at home.
p/s I just have to add that the dreams were both different in nature. One happened after bumping into my 3-year-old ThaiExpress guy at the usual club. The dream seemed so real, I could almost feel his lips on mine! As for the other dream.. I can't really remember the exact details, but it happened before my surprise encounter. What it was about? I don't know. I was probably still reeling from the shock.
Was browsing thru a gay online portal, much like the one closer to home, when this piece of write up in one of the profiler's page caught my eye. I must say, what he wrote touched my heart. So much so that it deserved to be published here. I guess it's because I could empathise with how he was feeling when he wrote this.
A Message to my ex-lover
Dear Eric
I am sorry; I haven’t talked to you about what’s having been kept deep inside my heart in so long. I feel like I have been lost, no bearings, no compass. I kept crashing into things. A little crazy. I guess, I have been lost before. You were my true north. I could always steer for home when you were my home.
Forgive me for being so angry when you left. I was thinking it was your entire fault. However, time cures all wounds. I first realized that to love is not to possess, but to let go. By letting go of you, I let go my fear of being betrayed; then, I let go my hatred from being betrayed. And I am doing better now. The separation helps me.
Most of all, you help me. On all the lonely night without you sleeping next to me on our bed, you came into my dream. With your smile, you were there caress me like no others, rub me like a child, called me BeBe, BeBe…and, I used to wake up in tears. But, I am stronger now; no more tears but smile. All I remembered from the dreams is the feeling of peace and love. I try to keep it alive as long as I could, and I move on.
I am ready to go on the journey of life on my own now, and, I ready to tell you I am sorry, I lost so many things. I am sorry i didn’t take better care of you, so that you never spend one minute being cold, or scared, or sicked. I am sorry I didn’t try harder to find words to tell you what I was feeling and how much I loved you. I am sorry, I have fought with you. I’m sorry I didn’t apologize more, I was too proud. I am sorry; I didn’t bring more compliments, as I never think you worth. I am sorry I made you cried. I am sorry I disappointed you and let you down. I am sorry.
‘Goodbye my lover, you have been the one for me’. And as I move on, I will remember you; remember us and all we used to be.
With all my love
Vincent
A Message to my ex-lover
Dear Eric
I am sorry; I haven’t talked to you about what’s having been kept deep inside my heart in so long. I feel like I have been lost, no bearings, no compass. I kept crashing into things. A little crazy. I guess, I have been lost before. You were my true north. I could always steer for home when you were my home.
Forgive me for being so angry when you left. I was thinking it was your entire fault. However, time cures all wounds. I first realized that to love is not to possess, but to let go. By letting go of you, I let go my fear of being betrayed; then, I let go my hatred from being betrayed. And I am doing better now. The separation helps me.
Most of all, you help me. On all the lonely night without you sleeping next to me on our bed, you came into my dream. With your smile, you were there caress me like no others, rub me like a child, called me BeBe, BeBe…and, I used to wake up in tears. But, I am stronger now; no more tears but smile. All I remembered from the dreams is the feeling of peace and love. I try to keep it alive as long as I could, and I move on.
I am ready to go on the journey of life on my own now, and, I ready to tell you I am sorry, I lost so many things. I am sorry i didn’t take better care of you, so that you never spend one minute being cold, or scared, or sicked. I am sorry I didn’t try harder to find words to tell you what I was feeling and how much I loved you. I am sorry, I have fought with you. I’m sorry I didn’t apologize more, I was too proud. I am sorry; I didn’t bring more compliments, as I never think you worth. I am sorry I made you cried. I am sorry I disappointed you and let you down. I am sorry.
‘Goodbye my lover, you have been the one for me’. And as I move on, I will remember you; remember us and all we used to be.
With all my love
Vincent
- Mood:
melancholy - Music:Goodbye My Lover by James Blunt
It's past 2 in the morning and I'm still wide awake. Not a good sign, especially when I have to be up for work later at 4.30am. It might be the latte which I had last night when I was with orrh at Starbucks. It could also be the fact that something is bothering me. Except I can't quite place my finger on it. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
Would bumping into an old friend whom I've not catch up with, for what seems like decades, had anything to do with how I'm feeling tonight? This morning? Or would knowing that another close friend of ours had recently broken up with his then bf, only to get attached with another cuter guy who is rather known in the blogosphere? And no, it wasn't that close friend of ours who had approached the cuter guy. It was the cuter guy who did so, after breaking up with his also then bf to be with our close friend. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
Received a sms from one of my ex-bosses two days back informing me of the new number. Jokingly, I asked if the phone had dropped into the toilet bowl too, like mine. The reply almost drove me into panic mode. "I guess i'd be seeing u inside shortly lah. Unfortunately." Ex-boss later told me, after much secrecy and persuasion, that the CurryNuttyBrothers had tricked and nabb-ed the ex-boss. A way out was futile as urine test showed up positive. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
During my usual nightly routine of running myself under the cold shower, I asked myself if removing my presence online had driven me to such a state. Alone. Quiet. Withdrawn. With the removal also comes the near non-existence of gatherings and parties. Would that explain why I'm still single? But I'm not sad nor depressed. I'm happy where I am. Happy with what I'm doing at work. And happy to not be meeting anyone new. Although sometimes I do wonder if it's healthy. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
As for moving in with boyincap and his Han, the idea was mooted before they left for their short trip. Reason owing was personal. It's a good thing I hadn't given up the other place. Or should I? And start looking from scratch since I didn't quite like the idea of my future landlord's mum to be staying over, 2 months max whenever she comes to visit. urgh. I'm so not into parents. Or should I start taking interest in one now? For whose sake? Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
From the Astrologyzone website:
"Capricorn is one sign that enjoys working, and when faced with stress, their instincts tell them to work harder, longer and with more focused intensity."
"Yet while tap-dancing faster can make you feel better, the danger is that you can get so lost in busywork that you lose sight of the bigger picture."
Would bumping into an old friend whom I've not catch up with, for what seems like decades, had anything to do with how I'm feeling tonight? This morning? Or would knowing that another close friend of ours had recently broken up with his then bf, only to get attached with another cuter guy who is rather known in the blogosphere? And no, it wasn't that close friend of ours who had approached the cuter guy. It was the cuter guy who did so, after breaking up with his also then bf to be with our close friend. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
Received a sms from one of my ex-bosses two days back informing me of the new number. Jokingly, I asked if the phone had dropped into the toilet bowl too, like mine. The reply almost drove me into panic mode. "I guess i'd be seeing u inside shortly lah. Unfortunately." Ex-boss later told me, after much secrecy and persuasion, that the CurryNuttyBrothers had tricked and nabb-ed the ex-boss. A way out was futile as urine test showed up positive. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
During my usual nightly routine of running myself under the cold shower, I asked myself if removing my presence online had driven me to such a state. Alone. Quiet. Withdrawn. With the removal also comes the near non-existence of gatherings and parties. Would that explain why I'm still single? But I'm not sad nor depressed. I'm happy where I am. Happy with what I'm doing at work. And happy to not be meeting anyone new. Although sometimes I do wonder if it's healthy. Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
As for moving in with boyincap and his Han, the idea was mooted before they left for their short trip. Reason owing was personal. It's a good thing I hadn't given up the other place. Or should I? And start looking from scratch since I didn't quite like the idea of my future landlord's mum to be staying over, 2 months max whenever she comes to visit. urgh. I'm so not into parents. Or should I start taking interest in one now? For whose sake? Damn. I wish I know exactly why I'm feeling this way.
From the Astrologyzone website:
"Capricorn is one sign that enjoys working, and when faced with stress, their instincts tell them to work harder, longer and with more focused intensity."
"Yet while tap-dancing faster can make you feel better, the danger is that you can get so lost in busywork that you lose sight of the bigger picture."
- Mood: awake
- Music:if i am weak by humpback oak
Finally, home again. February has been a hectic month. Courses. Catching up with friends. More courses. Taking over of duties. Some more courses. And even more courses. But one thing good about this week's course, or the only thing that is good, is for once I'm near to home.
1. My previous posting - wishes do come true - was somewhat related to my weekend. To sum my weekend in one word, it would be Productive. Not only did I manage to earn some extra cash by helping out my ex-boss.. the generous husband + wife of ex-boss's friends even gave me a nice tip along with the supposed hourly payment. The extras sure helped in my finances for this month, considering that I won't be getting my allowances for this 3-month period of OJT.
2. Still related to the previous posting, I got more than what I bargained for prior to Valentine's Day. While the usual clicks in my group of happyfolks were out there (or in there, under the warm covers) celebrating St. Valentine with their other half, cupid had his own reason for leaving me out. And what a nice surprising reason it was too. I received my very own Valentine f**k! And he's always been on my list of I-would-get-attached-to...except-that-he-t
3. Still beaming from ear to ear, not to mention exhaustion, I met up with my boyincap for dinner on Sunday as planned. The idea was for me to be introduced to boyincap's love one, Han. Dining in Seah Street Deli turned out to be relaxing, except for the loud music from the nearby jukebox that I swear kept reminding me we were in some burger joint in some country side. Yee-haw!
We proceeded to Han + boyincap's place (more so the former's, thus his name placed first) for me to looksee and bring down the night. And it was again, relaxing. I had wanted to remain physically and sexually detached when I got there, and I did. We did. We just chatted, watched a bit of news and had a wonderful evening to cap the dinner, before sleep eventually find its way into our heavy eyelids.
During dinner, boyincap brought up the topic of me shifting to the east because of work. Han asked why. Told him it was to cut down on my travelling time. Besides, I've always wanted a place, away from my old man. That was when Han suggested for me to live in their place, in the extra room since he would be relocating overseas because of his job, and he didn't want to leave the place empty. Besides, boyincap added, he could use the company rather than staying there alone on days when Han is away. I had to literally put down my burger, chewed my turkey, and let my mind wander while the options ran through my analytical head.
boyincap lives there, but only on a part-time basis. but his residency would soon be less ermm part-time when he enlists for his national service. Han himself would no longer be living in as much, except maybe over the weekends when he comes back down from work. And I quite like the place. It is 5 mins away from town, yet it still gives me the convenience of travelling to work by train or bus. The fact that I'm nearer to work (as compared to the west) yet still can come home to a place of quiet retreat away from the city hustle and bustle while also being near the city, that is a plus point to me. And the rental's just as affordable. And I'll have boyincap for company. And Han, who boyincap just msged me saying, he likes me too. lol. I will have to meet up with my eastern (supposed) landlord for a discussion.
boyincap + Han. +moi?
1. My previous posting - wishes do come true - was somewhat related to my weekend. To sum my weekend in one word, it would be Productive. Not only did I manage to earn some extra cash by helping out my ex-boss.. the generous husband + wife of ex-boss's friends even gave me a nice tip along with the supposed hourly payment. The extras sure helped in my finances for this month, considering that I won't be getting my allowances for this 3-month period of OJT.
2. Still related to the previous posting, I got more than what I bargained for prior to Valentine's Day. While the usual clicks in my group of happyfolks were out there (or in there, under the warm covers) celebrating St. Valentine with their other half, cupid had his own reason for leaving me out. And what a nice surprising reason it was too. I received my very own Valentine f**k! And he's always been on my list of I-would-get-attached-to...except-that-he-t
3. Still beaming from ear to ear, not to mention exhaustion, I met up with my boyincap for dinner on Sunday as planned. The idea was for me to be introduced to boyincap's love one, Han. Dining in Seah Street Deli turned out to be relaxing, except for the loud music from the nearby jukebox that I swear kept reminding me we were in some burger joint in some country side. Yee-haw!
We proceeded to Han + boyincap's place (more so the former's, thus his name placed first) for me to looksee and bring down the night. And it was again, relaxing. I had wanted to remain physically and sexually detached when I got there, and I did. We did. We just chatted, watched a bit of news and had a wonderful evening to cap the dinner, before sleep eventually find its way into our heavy eyelids.
During dinner, boyincap brought up the topic of me shifting to the east because of work. Han asked why. Told him it was to cut down on my travelling time. Besides, I've always wanted a place, away from my old man. That was when Han suggested for me to live in their place, in the extra room since he would be relocating overseas because of his job, and he didn't want to leave the place empty. Besides, boyincap added, he could use the company rather than staying there alone on days when Han is away. I had to literally put down my burger, chewed my turkey, and let my mind wander while the options ran through my analytical head.
boyincap lives there, but only on a part-time basis. but his residency would soon be less ermm part-time when he enlists for his national service. Han himself would no longer be living in as much, except maybe over the weekends when he comes back down from work. And I quite like the place. It is 5 mins away from town, yet it still gives me the convenience of travelling to work by train or bus. The fact that I'm nearer to work (as compared to the west) yet still can come home to a place of quiet retreat away from the city hustle and bustle while also being near the city, that is a plus point to me. And the rental's just as affordable. And I'll have boyincap for company. And Han, who boyincap just msged me saying, he likes me too. lol. I will have to meet up with my eastern (supposed) landlord for a discussion.
boyincap + Han. +moi?
- Mood: high
one star - brighter than the others
two Hearts - beating for each other
now I see wishes really come true
you just have to dream
nothing's as bad as it seems
to be...believe me
Someone's waiting for you to try
you can't stop believing
wishes do come true
you got to believe me (wish on a star)
wishes do come true
two Hearts - beating for each other
now I see wishes really come true
you just have to dream
nothing's as bad as it seems
to be...believe me
Someone's waiting for you to try
you can't stop believing
wishes do come true
you got to believe me (wish on a star)
wishes do come true
Okay, just a quick disclaimer. I didn't come up with these 15 reasons. They were written by a max5 on Fridae. I just thought it was a good iPod comparison. Made me wonder why I didn't come up with that for my iPod video. Then again, I found out the said profiler is working in my organisation. :)
01. My iPod only listens to the music I want to listen to - I prefer someone who shares similar taste in music.
02. My iPod is cheaper and easier to maintain - If you want a ride, at least be on par.
03. My iPod doesn't mind wearing green or pink socks – That is my iPod, you should be a white or black socks kind of guy.
04. My iPod always has a song to cheer me up - A guy with good vocals, who needs EQ?
05. My iPod can play games with me and I never get to lose (I just turned it off) - Turn me on and you will win all the time. I have not lost yet, have I?
06. My iPod motivates me at the gym - I want to stay fit, and look the way I am now when I am fifty so you better be able to catch up.
07. My iPod doesn't have an opinion on anything I think or do - I prefer you to have some intellect and go easy on your egg or ego?
08. My iPod has a user-friendly interface - You must get along with my family members who are a combo cast from Melrose Place & Sex-In-The-City.
09. My iPod does not need more space, it has 20 GB of space, enough for a lifetime of love songs - You will have 60GB of space and together, we have 80GB.
10. My iPod will never shove me around - In the past, I have been dragged across the floor, shoved to the walls and pushed to the ground, no more EVER AGAIN.
11. My iPod compliments whatever I wear - You are gay, l dun expect you to wear your pants anywhere above your waistline.
12. My iPod believes in monogamy, it stays in my pants all the time - Yours should stay in your pants too.
13. My iPod does not flirt with other iPods - I would prefer that your iPod flirts with mine, exclusively.
14. My iPod sleeps closely next to me in bed – If you have to deal with cuddling each other to sleep, please tuck me in first, that is the least you can do.
15. My iPod can go for eighteen hours at a time. Can you? - If you can, Steve Jobs will win the next Nobel prize.
01. My iPod only listens to the music I want to listen to - I prefer someone who shares similar taste in music.
02. My iPod is cheaper and easier to maintain - If you want a ride, at least be on par.
03. My iPod doesn't mind wearing green or pink socks – That is my iPod, you should be a white or black socks kind of guy.
04. My iPod always has a song to cheer me up - A guy with good vocals, who needs EQ?
05. My iPod can play games with me and I never get to lose (I just turned it off) - Turn me on and you will win all the time. I have not lost yet, have I?
06. My iPod motivates me at the gym - I want to stay fit, and look the way I am now when I am fifty so you better be able to catch up.
07. My iPod doesn't have an opinion on anything I think or do - I prefer you to have some intellect and go easy on your egg or ego?
08. My iPod has a user-friendly interface - You must get along with my family members who are a combo cast from Melrose Place & Sex-In-The-City.
09. My iPod does not need more space, it has 20 GB of space, enough for a lifetime of love songs - You will have 60GB of space and together, we have 80GB.
10. My iPod will never shove me around - In the past, I have been dragged across the floor, shoved to the walls and pushed to the ground, no more EVER AGAIN.
11. My iPod compliments whatever I wear - You are gay, l dun expect you to wear your pants anywhere above your waistline.
12. My iPod believes in monogamy, it stays in my pants all the time - Yours should stay in your pants too.
13. My iPod does not flirt with other iPods - I would prefer that your iPod flirts with mine, exclusively.
14. My iPod sleeps closely next to me in bed – If you have to deal with cuddling each other to sleep, please tuck me in first, that is the least you can do.
15. My iPod can go for eighteen hours at a time. Can you? - If you can, Steve Jobs will win the next Nobel prize.
- Mood:
nostalgic - Music:Now and Forever by Richard Marx
I'm always at yahoo, but only to check my mails. It's common now for any online internet junkie to have more than one web-based email account. Hell, it's even normal for a non-tech savvy bimbo to own more than two email accounts. Just ask any internet user and they'll tell you what the different emails are for.
Anyway, since I was also, at one point of time, owner and moderators of various yahoogroups, I decide to login after a long period of absence. Crap. That's all I have for yahoogroups now. And for every list I own or moderate that has the emails posting set to "anyone can post", the list is sure to receive spams and junk mails by the bucket loads. Kinda makes you wonder what the people at yahoo is doing. Really. And for members settings set to "unmoderated", it seems that certain lists have grown in number, with many of the email addresses belonging to ridiculous long email addresses. Again, I wonder if the groups are anything to go by these days.
So I did what I should have done since early last year. Delete the group. Correction - groups.
One group especially had me in deep thoughts, as I recall back with fondness, how I had come up with so many great ideas to kickstart the list into actions. And subsequently, even a website to attract my users. Alas, the dream had since crashed. Zoom In Fashion.
And from the group's description homepage, here it is again. For old keepsakes.
Unconventional forms take shape,
While idle minds metamorph.
Idealistic dogma bordered on the unlimited boundaries,
and feed on the imaginary souls,
Amidst butchered mayhems and contorted chaos.
But within the rigid tandem,
of utter disbelief,
Therein lies
Zoom In Fashion Scene,
Uncultured, Unrefined and Unyield.
Come within the sphere of,
Individual Stylists,
Meshed Gurus,
or Gender-Bender Designers,
and feel and touch and see,
Our Zoom In Fadshion Seen.
- skru the seams!
Anyway, since I was also, at one point of time, owner and moderators of various yahoogroups, I decide to login after a long period of absence. Crap. That's all I have for yahoogroups now. And for every list I own or moderate that has the emails posting set to "anyone can post", the list is sure to receive spams and junk mails by the bucket loads. Kinda makes you wonder what the people at yahoo is doing. Really. And for members settings set to "unmoderated", it seems that certain lists have grown in number, with many of the email addresses belonging to ridiculous long email addresses. Again, I wonder if the groups are anything to go by these days.
So I did what I should have done since early last year. Delete the group. Correction - groups.
One group especially had me in deep thoughts, as I recall back with fondness, how I had come up with so many great ideas to kickstart the list into actions. And subsequently, even a website to attract my users. Alas, the dream had since crashed. Zoom In Fashion.
And from the group's description homepage, here it is again. For old keepsakes.
Unconventional forms take shape,
While idle minds metamorph.
Idealistic dogma bordered on the unlimited boundaries,
and feed on the imaginary souls,
Amidst butchered mayhems and contorted chaos.
But within the rigid tandem,
of utter disbelief,
Therein lies
Zoom In Fashion Scene,
Uncultured, Unrefined and Unyield.
Come within the sphere of,
Individual Stylists,
Meshed Gurus,
or Gender-Bender Designers,
and feel and touch and see,
Our Zoom In Fadshion Seen.
- skru the seams!
It's been a long time since I last went out on a date with someone. Especially not from someone in the club. So long that I almost forgot how it feels to just be having dinner with him and then coffee after, enjoying the conversation, watching the world passed us by, like we're the only two souls in the world. So long.
Until last night.
I didn't even know it was coming. I had thought it was just dinner and then home. Then again, I didn't even think the dinner would materialize, after all, he was supposed to call the night before to confirm the details, but failing which, I figured maybe he was only teasing. And why not too, since he is already with somebody (according to him) even as I'm writing this down.
How I knew him was another unexpected surprise.
Me and Fai had been observing him, with the latter eyeing him. He, the subject of our adoration, was a boy. Clearly. From his cute boyish looks, innocent eyes, and abs you could wash your dirty laundry on, we both agreed that of all present on the dance floor, the boy in cap is non-arguably the only guy worth rooting for. Besides, his ability to shake and groove to the music like as if he owned the podium, that has just got to score in our good books of cute tooshies.
So there.
Last week me, Fai and the happyfolks plus many others and then some more of my friends from KL came down to witness a reunion of sorts, at HQ, no less. With dj.fendie flying in from KL himself, on the decks, churning out beats after beats of matured loungy basslines, it was all we could do to restrain our limbs. Drinks aplenty, and rhythm meet joints, everyone was truly intoxicated with the richness of happyness.
And that's when it happened. Boy in cap! Except this time, he was without his signature cap. But there he was, dancing, or rather standing, in front of me. Gulp! I could have sworn he was looking at me. So I smiled. He returned the smile. And then before I know it, he came forward, extended his hand and we exchanged names. Just like that!
Damn, my heart just melted, meshed onto the dance floor, and I could barely breathe in the already dank club heavied with smoke. We danced together. Danced a lot more. We exchanged numbers in between a few dance numbers. And then we parted, with him staying behind with this muscular stocky of a man beside him (the same one who Fai and I have seen dancing with him for the past few weeks), while I headed for home.
And then he called. 2 days ago. To ask if I would like to do dinner. Boy in cap, mind you.
And that's how we ended up together. Dinner. Followed by coffee after on the plush and comfortable sofas in Pacific Coffee.
Did I enjoy myself after last night? Yes, tremendously. I even felt like how I feel a long time ago when I was still very much dating and then loving my ex of more than one year. I haven't felt anything like that since. That would explain why I'm still very much single. With a few dates and short relationships on the side that never really did worked out.
Here's the part that just about hit me with Cupid's arrows.
"I was wondering... Would you like to have dinner, one of these days..? (pause) with me and Han? I find you very special, and I would like to share you with Han."
err..
Han, being the muscular stocky man he is with currently... all I could reply was - Yes. That would be nice.
It's nice to know that the feelings are mutual. Me and boy in cap. It was nice to know that in under 4 hours of knowing each other, and boy in cap already finds me special. That he finds me pleasant and cute. But really, sharing me with Han? Lol.
And no, he assures me later, that they weren't looking for a threesome. Especially not him. He just wants to share his happyness with Han. The way a little boy would share his box of special candies with his dad.
The boy in cap. *glazed eyes*
Until last night.
I didn't even know it was coming. I had thought it was just dinner and then home. Then again, I didn't even think the dinner would materialize, after all, he was supposed to call the night before to confirm the details, but failing which, I figured maybe he was only teasing. And why not too, since he is already with somebody (according to him) even as I'm writing this down.
How I knew him was another unexpected surprise.
Me and Fai had been observing him, with the latter eyeing him. He, the subject of our adoration, was a boy. Clearly. From his cute boyish looks, innocent eyes, and abs you could wash your dirty laundry on, we both agreed that of all present on the dance floor, the boy in cap is non-arguably the only guy worth rooting for. Besides, his ability to shake and groove to the music like as if he owned the podium, that has just got to score in our good books of cute tooshies.
So there.
Last week me, Fai and the happyfolks plus many others and then some more of my friends from KL came down to witness a reunion of sorts, at HQ, no less. With dj.fendie flying in from KL himself, on the decks, churning out beats after beats of matured loungy basslines, it was all we could do to restrain our limbs. Drinks aplenty, and rhythm meet joints, everyone was truly intoxicated with the richness of happyness.
And that's when it happened. Boy in cap! Except this time, he was without his signature cap. But there he was, dancing, or rather standing, in front of me. Gulp! I could have sworn he was looking at me. So I smiled. He returned the smile. And then before I know it, he came forward, extended his hand and we exchanged names. Just like that!
Damn, my heart just melted, meshed onto the dance floor, and I could barely breathe in the already dank club heavied with smoke. We danced together. Danced a lot more. We exchanged numbers in between a few dance numbers. And then we parted, with him staying behind with this muscular stocky of a man beside him (the same one who Fai and I have seen dancing with him for the past few weeks), while I headed for home.
And then he called. 2 days ago. To ask if I would like to do dinner. Boy in cap, mind you.
And that's how we ended up together. Dinner. Followed by coffee after on the plush and comfortable sofas in Pacific Coffee.
Did I enjoy myself after last night? Yes, tremendously. I even felt like how I feel a long time ago when I was still very much dating and then loving my ex of more than one year. I haven't felt anything like that since. That would explain why I'm still very much single. With a few dates and short relationships on the side that never really did worked out.
Here's the part that just about hit me with Cupid's arrows.
"I was wondering... Would you like to have dinner, one of these days..? (pause) with me and Han? I find you very special, and I would like to share you with Han."
err..
Han, being the muscular stocky man he is with currently... all I could reply was - Yes. That would be nice.
It's nice to know that the feelings are mutual. Me and boy in cap. It was nice to know that in under 4 hours of knowing each other, and boy in cap already finds me special. That he finds me pleasant and cute. But really, sharing me with Han? Lol.
And no, he assures me later, that they weren't looking for a threesome. Especially not him. He just wants to share his happyness with Han. The way a little boy would share his box of special candies with his dad.
The boy in cap. *glazed eyes*
- Mood:
happy - Music:the first time ever i saw your face by alison moyet
There. Finally, the pc at home is updated with some useful programs. Even managed to download songs I've been wanting to have without having to buy the tracks from iTunes store. Thank LimeWire for that. I guess after removing the older version and installing the latest 4.10.5, this P2P baby is working like a charm. One good thing is the absence of ad-ditional ad-related popups/wares. Looks like skipping gym training today was well worth the sacrifice.
Did a bit of house-cleaning in the pc and came across this old favourite comic strip. Found a website link and thought why the heck not. And waddaya know, they're still alive! And updated with new strips every week. Here's the older copy I found.
For the latest one, you can drop by Adam & Andy.
Did a bit of house-cleaning in the pc and came across this old favourite comic strip. Found a website link and thought why the heck not. And waddaya know, they're still alive! And updated with new strips every week. Here's the older copy I found.
For the latest one, you can drop by Adam & Andy.
- Mood: cheerful
- Music:I've Never Been To Me by Charlene
It's gong xi fa cai time again. And this year we welcome the year of the Dog. For many, it is said that this year will be a prosperous one, while others are told to offer their best wishes and give generously in order to deflect away the bad luck. Whatever your horoscope reads (or being told to you by some money-spinning fortune teller), we all still hope for the same thing - A Better Future.
My new job is doing really well, with the bonuses getting bigger as the economy picks up. I am also in the midst of shifting to a new place in the densely-populated Eastern sector brimming with eye candies, thus spelling out my much-awaited i-n-d-e-p-e-n-d-e-n-c-e. The old man at home almost coughed up furballs when I told him the news, but I assured him that I'm not running away. It is just so I could cut down the traveling time to work. I didn't tell him that I also wanted a change in the environment of course. That would've given the old man a heart attack. Mum tells me that he worries about his children's well-being all the time. It's just that he doesn't show nor say it. Man's ego, she says. A Father's Pride.
Looks like things are really picking up this year. I've even got my global investments funds updated and re-channeled them for maximum growth from the profits the previous investments made. That's one good thing about having a friend as your Financial Advisor. Only problem is, you almost always find it hard to sit opposite him at the table, without so much as to let your thoughts wander, especially when he is also the same guy you've had a crush on since your 1st long-paying job atop some hill. 8 years! Doggertandit. You grow with him. :)
Love life? hmm... It's coming to a year now - in April - and I'm still, very much yes, single. That's cause to celebrate, really. Why not? Especially when every of my friends know that I'm notorious in the relationship scene. Going in and out of them like as if boyfriends were the new year's clothes, nahhh. That misconception is last year's new year's clothes. This year, I'm just me. Not a loner, but just that swinging bachelor. I've had my fair share of dates, but they didn't quite match up. I've let them go, not quite sure knowing why I did it. Cho-to. Was there even a reason to begin with?
Aaah, but there's always the close group of friends who are there to pick you up and indulge you silly. The ones who didn't mind celebrating their birthdays in your usual hangout joint, when in fact it's not even their birthdays. Or the ones who have many times gotten drunk on alcohol, cakes, chocolates, movies and grapevines. Even for those married to their beloved beaus, I'm just grateful and touched that they haven't left to build up their nest, thus leaving us or me behind. We're growing together - us, them and boyfriends included. (ex-boyfriends too!)
So there. With my life back in the lane, I'm able to see better what lies ahead. Not that any planning I've done has ever worked for me. But still, it does helpes in charting my future. And I can't think of any other better way to start the Year of the Dog, than with a new journal. It's time to get my writing back online.
Sa-lam! :)
My new job is doing really well, with the bonuses getting bigger as the economy picks up. I am also in the midst of shifting to a new place in the densely-populated Eastern sector brimming with eye candies, thus spelling out my much-awaited i-n-d-e-p-e-n-d-e-n-c-e. The old man at home almost coughed up furballs when I told him the news, but I assured him that I'm not running away. It is just so I could cut down the traveling time to work. I didn't tell him that I also wanted a change in the environment of course. That would've given the old man a heart attack. Mum tells me that he worries about his children's well-being all the time. It's just that he doesn't show nor say it. Man's ego, she says. A Father's Pride.
Looks like things are really picking up this year. I've even got my global investments funds updated and re-channeled them for maximum growth from the profits the previous investments made. That's one good thing about having a friend as your Financial Advisor. Only problem is, you almost always find it hard to sit opposite him at the table, without so much as to let your thoughts wander, especially when he is also the same guy you've had a crush on since your 1st long-paying job atop some hill. 8 years! Doggertandit. You grow with him. :)
Love life? hmm... It's coming to a year now - in April - and I'm still, very much yes, single. That's cause to celebrate, really. Why not? Especially when every of my friends know that I'm notorious in the relationship scene. Going in and out of them like as if boyfriends were the new year's clothes, nahhh. That misconception is last year's new year's clothes. This year, I'm just me. Not a loner, but just that swinging bachelor. I've had my fair share of dates, but they didn't quite match up. I've let them go, not quite sure knowing why I did it. Cho-to. Was there even a reason to begin with?
Aaah, but there's always the close group of friends who are there to pick you up and indulge you silly. The ones who didn't mind celebrating their birthdays in your usual hangout joint, when in fact it's not even their birthdays. Or the ones who have many times gotten drunk on alcohol, cakes, chocolates, movies and grapevines. Even for those married to their beloved beaus, I'm just grateful and touched that they haven't left to build up their nest, thus leaving us or me behind. We're growing together - us, them and boyfriends included. (ex-boyfriends too!)
So there. With my life back in the lane, I'm able to see better what lies ahead. Not that any planning I've done has ever worked for me. But still, it does helpes in charting my future. And I can't think of any other better way to start the Year of the Dog, than with a new journal. It's time to get my writing back online.
Sa-lam! :)
- Mood: happy
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